You being you, awakens me

Let’s begin with what I mean when I say awakening — words like this are slippery. To me awakening is the recognition of our essential nature. The realisation of who we are, before any content of personality, traits or preferences. Ultimately to awaken to our Self as universal, infinite, eternal Awareness.

And the consistent experience of this essential nature is happiness, peace, joy, ease…all the nice stuff we’re looking for in the world.

So this post is pointing to the everyday ways that we are guided back to our essential nature — to awaken. To know that the good feelings we’re looking for, and which seem to come from another, are in fact our own Self. The same in me as it is in you.

And that we’re drawn to be our Self, to know our Self, to return home. So first…

Here are Sarah’s words

My friend recently said this to me, “you being you, awakens me”. I had to think about it at first and then I got it. Me being in my truth awakened her truth in her.

You must have felt this too. There are some people that lift you up and take you deeper into yourself. Not in a happy way, although it could be, but I mean in a higher vibration kind of a way.

There are others that do the opposite. You know when you walk into a room that you feel the vibe in that room, or you can pick up on how people are feeling before they’ve even opened their mouth.

This is even more nuanced than whether someone is warm and welcoming or cold and shut off. It’s the energy that someone emits when they are standing in their truth and being their authentic self.

It’s almost hard to put words to and yet I have noticed how it feels in the presence of people who are doing this. Incidentally I feel the same way around this friend of mine and I wonder how much of this is reciprocity; probably a great deal.

“As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

What struck me in Sarah’s piece was this line…

There are others that do the opposite

And I want to share how ‘you being you, awakens me’ with these people too.

Following on from Sarah’s theme, we are drawn to feel good, and so if we are hanging out with people who seem to bring us down, we will find a way out. Sometimes that might even be be getting drunk while we’re around them, to soothe ourselves from the inner voice saying ‘what are you doing here?’.

Whatever you’re doing you’re always trying to feel better, you’re always trying to find your Self (you just don’t always know that’s what you’re doing).

Then sometimes, getting drunk in the name of ‘friendship’ doesn’t seem viable anymore and so you move out of these relationships that bring you down and into ones that feel better. These seemingly ‘bad vibe’ people have awakened you along the way. Now you feel your Self more.

What a gift!

And then a step further

This is the part Marianne is talking about in the second part of her quote:

“As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

When you come to know who you really are, and to see that every time you’ve felt good you’ve been feeling your Self, you also get to start enlightening yourself of the fearful inner stories that keep you in resistance to the world. Which veil you from your Self.

Now these people, who you might otherwise push away, are seen as gifts.

I’ll give an example. I was in a group once and there was one group member who seemed to be hanging out in victim mode all the time. I couldn’t bear it.

I was raised to resist victim behaviour. The word ‘pathetic’ was used alot to show how awful such behaviour was. And so — of course! — victim behaviour would be resisted. It looked dangerous. It looked like love would be withheld, I would be in trouble, if I behaved like that (or clearly if I even just associated myself with it!).

But in conversation with a friend, who knows the truth of who we are, she pointed me towards the victim role I was taking — victim to the other’s victim-ness! And she asked — and this one struck me right in the heart — what is it in you that wants to give up and be looked after like she does?

Boom. That was the truth of it. Something in me wanted to be cared for. I wanted to flop down, and for someone to hold me, and tell me it’s OK and bring me cups of tea and warm blankets, and to feel sorry for myself.

The story of ‘don’t be a victim’ had been creating a divide in me, shutting off part of what was really wanted. And all of this psychological activity was veiling my essential nature as it tried to manage and control the world and me, to align with the story.

Oof that’s hard work!

Since that day, there is such love for those in a tough spot. There is full inner acknowledgement of ‘me too, I do victim too when things look terrible’. And there is allowance within me to flop and say enough, I need a rest, I need to snuggle with a blanket. Although funnily enough…those times are rare. It’s always the way, that the fearful imagination of the mind is a million times worse than reality.

And so everyone — all of you — all of us —

You being you, awakens me

So why would we want anything to change in how you are?

You being you, awakens me.

Whether you’re being fully your Self, being the heart-lifting mirror that reminds others of their essential nature. Or you’re caught up in stories of the mind, to mirror them back, so they can be seen for what they are. It all has the power to wake you up.

It’s all perfect!

All you need is to know who you really are, and what gifts the people around you are bringing every single day, to awaken you.

With love, Helen

On 11th March 12.30pm UK, my monthly call this month is for coaches and guides in this same line of work. We’re going to explore the shift from the ‘self awareness’ of normal development into ‘Awareness as the Self’ of awakening. Read all about it and join here.

I coach and guide smart, passionate, curious people who care about improving the lives of those around them. Often coaches and leaders, they’ve worked hard all their lives to be the ‘best’ them and it doesn’t seem to have delivered the happiness, security or freedom they expected. Now they’re wondering what else is available. I guide you back, prior to stories, to remember the real you because that’s what you, me and the whole world really wants! Find out more here.