How are you feeling about Christmas?

Become aware of the feelings that are swirling around for you at this magnifying time of year. And consider that they don’t need fixing.

“If you think you’re enlightened, go spend a week with your family.” Ram Dass

What a snowstorm of thoughts and feelings are available when it comes to Christmas.

Excitement and delight building up if you have little ones somewhere in your life — or even if you don’t and are simply a huge fan of the festive season yourself!

Concern for your workload and how much you have to get done, and now with more ‘jobs’ to fit onto the list.

Maybe a can’t-be-bothered-ness. Perhaps last year with covid and lockdowns you came to see that Christmas isn’t a ‘thing’ other than us making it that. And so maybe you don’t feel there’s a point to getting all het up about it or scurrying around buying, wrapping and sending.

Or is there a dread? Do you have family who you really can’t bear to be with. Are you already planning the time of day…or morning, when you’re going to have your first drink so you can handle whoever that ‘dreadful’ person is.

Perhaps you have a feeling of pressure to do it right, and get it perfect. Whether for yourself, friends or family — it looks like this day (and all surrounding days of entertaining and being entertained) has to go well. And everyone has to be happy.

Or a depression, that what you see in TV adverts and hear everyone talking and sharing about, is their ‘perfect’ Christmas with everything happening just as planned, with their beautiful connected time. And you feel like telling them all to f^&* off.

And the last one I want to acknowledge, which is definitely by no means the least, is that this is Christmas without someone you love. Maybe the first you’ve ever had to face. Maybe you’ve already had lots of Christmases without this loved one, and yet the sadness still appears. You miss them. You wish they could be here.

What an incredible variety of experiences. Made evident and magnified in the face of this day that seems so important.

Because, do you notice that — whatever Christmas is magnifying — is a familiar pattern in life generally?

It’s never an ‘always’ with patterns for anyone, but do you see that there’s a tendency of a pattern?

Whether it’s a tendency towards an excited and delighted disposition? Or a tendency to drink to numb out from difficult situations. Or a tendency to feel the pressure to get it all right. Or, to feel sad about the one who’s not here any more.

None of these feelings are bad or wrong. All of these feelings make perfect sense based on the thoughts and beliefs that look real. The feelings arise naturally and inevitably as a result of the thought in that moment.

In the same way Crunchy Nut Cornflakes appear inevitably in our kitchen on Christmas Eve based on the belief ‘this cereal is only for Christmas’…what? Just my family that believes that?!…Anyway, the point…whatever you feel in any moment is appearing, inevitably, based on the thoughts or beliefs passing through in that moment.

So my questions for you…

If you knew thoughts and feelings can’t hurt or harm you — what would that change?

If you knew thoughts and feelings are always changing — what would that make available to you?

If you knew that you are something beyond any thought or feeling — the sky untouched by the snowstorm— what do you notice?

“Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling with the mistaken belief that you cannot bear the pain. But you have already borne the pain. What you have not done is feel all you are beyond that pain.” Khalil Gibran  

With love, Helen

On Friday this week, 10th December, it’s the monthly all-members call. This month it’s on What’s the Trouble with Christmas. You’ll get to explore the questions I’ve offered at the end of this post and come into the clarity and lightness of being with whatever your Christmas thoughts are. Join as a member on any tier to join the call live and get the recording. We meet at 12.30pm UK on Friday 10th December 21.

I coach and guide smart, passionate, curious people who care about improving the lives of those around them. Often coaches and leaders, they’ve worked hard all their lives to be the ‘best’ them and it doesn’t seem to have delivered the happiness, security or freedom they expected. Now they’re wondering what else is available. I guide you back, prior to stories, to remember the real you because that’s what you, me and the whole world really wants! Find out more here.

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