How do you hear these words: ‘there is no other’? I realise now that my mind had got very carried away with ideas of what it meant! What I see about it now makes so much more sense — and aligns with my experience. Have a read to see how it looks to you, compared to what you’ve imagined it to mean.
“An object is the name thought gives to reality when viewed from the point of view of a subject. In the absence of that point of view, experience is no longer divided into these two elements — a subject and an object — and all seeming things are experienced as they truly are, eternal and infinite.” Rupert Spira
I heard spiritual teachers say ‘there is no other’ and I took it literally.
I thought the ultimate goal was to literally not see another body in front of me. That all these human others would disappear and…
I realise as I write this that I’d never considered what I would see in the absence of these others. And I also realise I hadn’t considered the rest of the other forms of life.
I hadn’t considered if I’d stop seeing dogs, cats, birds or trees. I hadn’t considered if I’d stop seeing my own body when I looked down.
All I’d heard was this idea of there being no other. And took it literally.
Which was daft now I think about it!
Of course when we awaken and enlighten these apparent others remain. Of course there are still cats, dogs, birds, trees and my own body.
I can’t speak for these teachers and what they really meant, I am not them. But now I’ve seen the truth of our essential nature, it makes sense to say ‘there is no other’. So I’ll speak from my own experience from here. And if you hear someone else talking about ‘no other’ you can ask them what they mean.
There are two main ways I now see there being ‘no other’:
- Our essential nature is one and the same. There is no separate other. (Awakening)
- How an other appears is a function of thoughts-believed-true. Not separate from you. (Enlightenment)
Let’s look in turn at each.
1. Our essential nature is one and the same. There is no separate other.
This is the fundamental realisation of awakening (awakening being to see your essential nature, and then to see the nature of that nature).
Because the seeing of this is to see that my essential nature is an infinite, eternal and indivisible awareness.
This comes from seeing awareness does not end. There is no point at which my awareness stops and yours starts. There is no boundary at any point within awareness. It is one or — because even to call it ‘one’ is to give it too much thing-ness — it is not-two, nondual.
There is no other. Because what you essentially are, and what I essentially am, is the same infinite, eternal, indivisible awareness. We are not separate beings.
As Sara and I say in “The Complete Book of Awakening”
“Of course, it still looks like we are separate. But this is to mistake appearances for reality.”
We’ve been taught that the appearance is reality, but that is not the truth. In truth, reality is the most fundamental aspect of all experience. And that fundamental reality is found to contain no evidence of separation.
It is only found that…
“Thought supplies the “me in here” and “you/it out there.” Ilona Ciunaite, from the book “Liberation Unleashed”
Absent of thought — what remains?
Genuinely ask yourself that question, don’t just skip past it. Take a moment…absent of thought about me and you — what remains?
Notice that you’ve already experienced these times absent of thought, when you felt so in flow and connected to the moment, that the idea of me and you had disappeared. There was just a seamless flow of words and actions. Maybe it was when you fell in love. Maybe, if you’re really lucky, it was in an amazing team you worked with. Or perhaps on the sportsfield, or playing in a band. Or in an emergency situation when there was no space for thought.
When we say ‘no other’ we’re not talking about some special, far away, unreachable state of awakened-ness. You are already this.
One seamless, unfolding flow of words and actions. No me or other appearing in awareness. Only labelled that via thought.
There is no separate other. Our essential nature is one and the same. Only thought makes it seem otherwise.
2. How an other appears is a function of thoughts-believed-true. Not separate from you.
This is the fundamental basis for enlightenment (enlightenment being to enlighten from the psychological confusions collected in earlier years).
Because the seeing of this is to see that the other and world show up as a function of what’s happening within your psychological beliefs in that moment. And the logic and obviousness of this becomes so much greater when you’ve already realised what I’ve shared in #1.
Given that our essential nature is one and the same, fluctuations in this activity called Helen are bound to impact and influence those activities called Sue, and John, and Kelly.
A Helen who’s in an interview for a new job is caught up in beliefs about ‘me’ and what I need to do to be OK — I really hope they don’t ask me anything too hard, I really need to show I’m up to this, I’m convinced the other candidates are better, what am I even doing here… — y’know — those kinds of beliefs. So a Helen, caught up in all that, is going to have an entirely different experience of those ‘others’ interviewing her, than if all those thoughts dropped away, or stopped being believed.
In the belief of the thoughts, she may well act defensive. Or protective. Or stumble over her words. Or blurt out something really inappropriate at an attempt to be funny (yes, speaking from experience!).
And, given this state of play, the interviewers will act differently. Perhaps ask questions differently. Not warm to her so much. Probably be less likely to hire her.
Even if she wasn’t outwardly displaying these behaviours, that one essential nature still feels the fluctuations of the activity within Helen. The interviewers, even if they aren’t consciously aware of feeling those fluctuations in themselves, will still feel it and respond to that accordingly with an ‘I’m not sure she’s right for the job’.
And she’ll leave the interview saying those interviewers were awful and intimidating and incompetent, and other such other-judgement. But through what lens were they being perceived? Could Helen ever perceive another in any way apart from through her own limited awareness in that moment? Were they simply appearing as a function of her?
Now, yes, there is something that these others are in and of themselves. The Helen character doesn’t create them. But how they appear to Helen in any moment is a function of Helen in that moment. They are not separate. Both at a fundamental energetic level. And at a perceptual level. There is ‘no other’.
And so perfection! The no-job-offer outcome — especially if it becomes seen as a repeating pattern for every job Helen goes for. Or the ‘all interviewers are terrible’ judgements — especially if it becomes seen as a repeating pattern everywhere Helen goes. These repeating patterns — for which it’s seen that ‘I am the common denominator’ — provide the opportunity to get curious about the thoughts being taken as truths in those moments. To see that the other appears as a function of these thoughts believed in that moment.
And therefore the opportunity arises to enlighten from these thoughts, by realising they really aren’t true. And that the absence of belief in them — or any other thought — makes for a much easier, lighter, flow-full life.
Funnily enough, the ultimate thought-believed true — ‘I am Helen’ —when seen as untrue like all the other thoughts, leads us right back to awakening again! Clever isn’t it!
So these apparent ‘others’. They are not separate from you. How an other appears is a function of thoughts-believed-true. Not separate from you.
There is no other.
And they don’t need to disappear for you to know this to be true.
What does this look like to you now?
Much love, Helen
P.S. Would you like to join my membership community? We explore both these aspects — awakening and enlightenment. Together.
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