Last week I shared about ADHD not being an actual problem. When it felt like a problem to Juliet she spent hours trying to follow all the advice and read all the books about being organised and planning, when some of that just wasn’t her strength.
This prompted me to recognise all the places where we’re inundated with instructions of things to do or not do. Advice about the right way to take action, or the right way to rest! Top tips and expert perspectives on how to exercise / sleep / breathe / eat / run your business / spend time with your kids…
And then Dean messaged me about being on his podcast again, and I just had to write about it. Here’s what I posted on LinkedIn:
The only advice you’ll get from me…
Dean Whitby and I were emailing together earlier this week about ‘what business owners can do differently’ when it comes to the hidden emotional cost of growing a business, and what it really feels like to be the person everyone depends on.
From where I sit, ‘more advice on things to do’ is the last thing you need.
The world is awash with advice about what to do.
You don’t need more instructions, advice or strategies about what to do. That’s not the problem.
The problem is what stops you from considering all that advice and following through with what’s right for you.
When you feel clear and solid in yourself, that process is effortless and obvious – you consider the options, you bring it into your context, and you decide what’s right for you and your company.
But when you feel overwhelmed, uncertain, spiralling, defensive, or negative in any way, that process is a minefield of triggers and problems.
You don’t know where to start. There are too many options that all have some merit. So you either follow loads and get lost. Or get stuck debating, and not moving on anything.
You don’t need more advice. You need to feel solid in yourself.
So if you’re a business owner feeling like you’ve got advice coming out your ears, but it’s not making the difference you want – here’s the extent of my ‘doing’ advice for you:
1. Notice how you feel. If you feel negative, overwhelmed, pressured, or stuck there’s a root cause creating that which can be solved.
2. Notice if you keep trying practical solutions and they keep failing. Or you keep failing the solutions by hesitating, pulling back, reacting, or sabotaging. If you do, there’s a root cause sabotaging you that can be solved.
3. Notice if you’re not taking obvious action e.g. ‘I feel isolated’ – the obvious action step would be to get out and find some people. If you’re not doing that (or you do it and then shrink back) there’s a root cause stopping you that can be solved.
You don’t need more advice. You need to feel solid in yourself. Then all the advice gets so much easier to navigate.
If you, or someone you know, has a problem that keeps circling them, and no amount of advice, recommendations or top tips are solving it, there’s likely a root cause that needs removing.
When you remove the root cause, you get back in forward momentum, considering the advice, and doing what’s right for you.
If you want to find out more, book a Discovery Call here.
Next steps from here:
- Feel good – explore the Founders Reset
- Subscribe for regular email updates
- Connect with me on LinkedIn