The season of goodwill – or frustration and arguments?

There’s a common theme among the leaders I work with. They want to be less judgmental, less frustrated – at work & at home. But their judgement looks justified – until it doesn’t.

“Every time we find ourselves reacting to anyone or anything, ask on whose behalf we are reacting. We will nearly always find that it is on behalf of a non-existent self.” Rupert Spira ‬

Black & White image of man and woman on a bench looking like they've had an argument

It’s so compelling to think frustration or annoyance with others justifies our position, that it makes us right and them wrong, that we should be angry or un-trusting of them. read more

Leader? What about the followers?

I care about people being at their best.

My business is about helping SME leaders be at their best so their teams and their business can be too.

So I spend a lot of time reading posts and articles about what makes a great or terrible leader. What 5 things a manager must do. What the secret ingredient is we’ve been missing all these years.

And there is lots of great stuff out there.

And, although I believe bosses are important and that change will stick best if it comes from the top – in most business structures as they stand today at least – I also believe in adult relationships at work.

But most of what I read puts the full weight of responsibility on the boss to make things work in the employment relationship.

Not only that, HR is on the sidelines with high expectations and often insufficient development support (I include myself in that from previous roles by the way!).

So I can’t help feeling the job of being a boss is becoming increasingly difficult, complex and lonely with everyone continually looking up for everything.

And I wonder then……

Is this how you want it to be?

How could it be different?

What could be done to change where you are?

What could you do to turn your relationships with your team into adult ones?

And if you’re an HR Pro, what development support could you provide to help this? Maybe it’s not a ‘proper’ course. Maybe it’s a coaching conversation. Maybe it’s a helpfully objective, challenging sounding board every now and then.

And, I wonder, what else?

Gemma Reucroft wrote a post recently on a similar theme.

What do you think?


I believe in people being the key to success in a business and that success is unlocked by great bosses. I’m an Executive Coach for SME leaders to help create success for you, for your team, for your business.

Get in touch for a chat if you believe in this stuff too and you want your business to be even better –
or take a look at my website to find out more

Did the parents leave yet?

So Richard Branson’s experimenting with Netflix’s ‘no holiday policy’ approach.

I love that he’s trying something different to see if it gets different results.

I wonder what different approaches people will take when putting it into practice –

1. Work constantly with no holiday (or just the statutory minimum) to avoid things falling apart, or to get that promotion, or both.


2. Develop strong teams (virtual or direct reports) so they can step away and the world won’t fall apart.

As much as I think this move away from a parent-child to adult-adult culture is great, I believe the parent will still be in the room……just further away from the holiday-booking activity. Because fundamentally the business will reward the behaviours it wants to see (think of parents with sticker charts for their kids).

So if people who work flat out and don’t take holiday get ‘rewarded’ with promotion for all their ‘hard work’ – guess what, you’ll get more people not taking holiday – and burning out.

If people get rewarded for leading, collaborating and delivering with, and through, others enabling them to have holiday without things falling apart then that’s what people will aspire to do.

So the parent’s still in the room – I don’t think you can ever completely get away from that – but at least they’re loosening the apron strings. Now, I wonder what behaviour-management approach they’ll use.

I believe in people being the key to success in a business and that success is unlocked by great bosses. I’m an Executive Coach for SME businesses to help create success for them, for their team, for their business.

Get in touch if you want this for your business –
or take a look at my website to find out more